stargazerlily2009's Blog

The nice things that have happened today:

(Snow day)

- read a lot of my book

- texted friends, had fun going back and forth

- phoned friends and enjoyed their company

- got a phone call, making plans for Friday!

- enjoyed movie that I finally got to watch

- I am able to be at peace most of the time and stop negative thoughts... I hope I am able to keep this up. I am enjoying not being anxious.

First post... some background info about my situation.

4 years ago I moved 9 hours away from my hometown (no job opportunities) to a major urban area for my career where there is a lot to do. I worked hard to build my my life. I grew to love my job, made many friends, involved in community/volunteer/sport activities. Things were great! I thrived!

Then the economy tanked...and I was forced to take a job in a very, very rural area about 2hours away. I felt quite isolated. And a short time later my relationship with my bf ended... ugh. I am going on month 4 in this new area..still pretty much by myself.

At first I was very resistant to opening up to my new area, leaving any chance I could and go back to where I used to live.  All I wanted was my old life back. In the new place I knew no one, staff at new job are polite but in my old job I was *friends* with so many people... it just is not the same. There is not a whole lot to do down here (being rural and all) - a major transition from having a calendar packed with socializing and activities.

Someone told me: things could be better but things could be much worse too. I know I heard it before but this time it stuck. Being grateful where I am is a goal I strive for. I am trying to change my thinking habits in order to have inner peace/serenity.

Finally I decided to accept this big change, focus on the positive things and start to reach out and make the most of this change. I joined a church (have been meaning to for a couple of years anyway); take part in church related classes; attend events in community; get involved in some volunteer projects; join a running group.

I midterm and moderate term plans:

Midterm: stay here another 1/5yrs (I can't take another episode of upheaval and stress so soon); enjoy positives at my job; work on spiritual development; try to meet more people and enjoy the area as best I can

Moderate: move to another urban area that is not so isolated

Long term: work on getting paperwork in place where I will have flexibility in who I can work for

So for the next 1.5years I would like to be calmer. I want to keep anxiety at bay the best I can. What works for me is to focus / have gratitude for things that are going well and give thanks for that.

I will try to post what I am thankful for.

For today big things:
- great housemates and their pets

- a job (especially in this economy)

- health

- friends, though far, who care